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Post by Alleyoop on May 16, 2014 14:11:45 GMT -6
WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt?
We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt'!
Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, 'You don't know Jack Schitt', you can correct them.
Sincerely, Crock O. Schitt
Alleyoop
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Post by Bashan on May 16, 2014 15:06:33 GMT -6
Gaaaaahhhhd Alley....too funny. And the kids are little Schitts?
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Doc's Anything Goes
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Say no to scooter abuse
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Post by jct842 on May 16, 2014 15:21:36 GMT -6
I have even seen some jack schitt t-shirts with some of those names on them.
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Post by cyborg on May 16, 2014 15:54:46 GMT -6
i know and i don't give a schitt!!!!!
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Post by JR on May 16, 2014 16:03:34 GMT -6
I have to tell you this is old as Schitt, dinosaur that is.
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Post by Alleyoop on May 16, 2014 18:13:20 GMT -6
Always a party POOPER IN THE CROWD, you dog schitt
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Doc's Anything Goes
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Post by richardv on May 16, 2014 20:32:26 GMT -6
HeHeHeee!!
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